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Dealing with Misbehaviour - All about Parenting Toddlers , Issue #004
January 22, 2003
Shaping the life of your precious onesAll about Parenting Toddlers
22nd January 2003
In This Issue:
1. Dealing with misbehavior
2. Fifteen-Minute Reading Activities
3. Toys: Tools for Learning
The following are some steps you can use when dealing with misbehavior :
Take action You will need to take action to help your child stop the behavior as your words alone will likely not be enough. It takes thousands of repetitions, hearing the words together with the actions, before the words alone suffice.
Validate feelings, not behavior When your child misbehaves, acknowledge and accept her feelings, but let her know that the behavior, what she did when she was angry, was unacceptable. "I know you are really angry, but you can not throw the blocks."
Acknowledge your childís intent/desire Use words to show that you understand what he wants to do. "You want to play with the water, but, you can not spill it on the table."
Teach alternatives Tell and show her what to do. Offer acceptable ways to channel her energy. If her action is halted, but she is not offered meaningful solutions, the unacceptable behavior will likely continue. You need to provide alternatives as young children donít know what to do instead. In this case, you can take him outside or in the tub and provide him with acceptable ways to fulfill his desire to explore with water.
Re-direct Help him express the same impulses in an acceptable way. "Itís not okay to throw blocks. Someone might get hurt. Letís throw this foam ball in the basket instead."
Use logical consequences If he still throws the blocks: "We have to put the blocks away for a while. We can try them again later today. Would you like to do a puzzle?" Make sure, however, to give him a chance to try the blocks again soon so he has the opportunity to practice what he has learned.
Make 15 minutes go a long way. Try these quick reading activities with your younger kids.
1. License to read. On car trips, make it a game to point out and read license plates, billboards, and interesting road signs.
2. Better than TV. Swap evening TV for a good action story or tale of adventure.
3. Look and listen. Too tired to read aloud? Listen to a book on tape and turn the book's pages with your children. You'll still be reading with them!
4. Labels, labels, labels. Label things in your children's room as they learn to name them. Have fun while they learn that written words are connected to everyday things.
5. Pack a snack, pack a book. Going someplace where there might be a long wait? Bring along a snack and a bag of favorite books.
6. Recipe for reading. The next time you cook with your children, read the recipe with them. Step-by-step instructions, ingredients, and measurements are all part of words in print!
7. Shop and read. Notice and read signs and labels in the supermarket. Back home, putting away groceries is another great time for reading labels.
8. Your long-distance lap. Away on a business trip? Take a few books with you, call home, and have your child curl up by the phone for a good night story.
9. A reading pocket. Slip fun things to read into your pocket to bring home: a comic strip from the paper, a greeting card, or even a fortune cookie from lunch. Create a special, shared moment your child can look forward to every day.
10. A little longer? When your child asks to stay up a little longer, say yes and make it a 15-minute family reading opportunity
What Toys Do Through toys, children learn about their world, themselves, and others. Choosing toys that appeal to your children and foster their learning will help you make their early years count.
Toys can teach children to:
Choosing Toys Remember that good toys are not necessarily expensive, and children do not need very many. The more a child can do with a toy, the more likely it is to be educational. Here are some tips to help you choose toys wisely for your child:
Hands-on toys build eye-hand coordination, encourage ideas about how things work, and foster cooperation and problem-solving.
Books and recordings help children appreciate words, literature, and music.
Art materials foster creativity and build skills that lead to reading, writing, and seeing beauty in life.
Few toys are as durable as hardwood unit blocks, and they teach children about geometry and gravity, shapes and balance.
Construction items contribute to muscle strength and help children learn about science and number ideas.
Musical instruments and experimental materials such as sand, water, and clay offer children control while appealing to their senses.
Active play equipment builds strong muscles and confidence to meet physical challenges.
Pretend play objects such as dolls, stuffed animals, and dramatic figures give children a chance to try new behaviors and use their imaginations.
If your child attends child care or preschool, look at the types of toys available. Is there a variety of safe and interesting toys? For toddlers and young preschoolers, there should be multiple copies of toys -- a great way to avoid conflicts.
For more activities for toddlers, Click Here ___________________________________________________________
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See you in the next issue. :-)
All the best,
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